Does your partner have a contentious relationship with his ex? Does she call, email or text him multiple times a day for seemingly unimportant issues? Perhaps to rehash an old argument or let him know about a movie she saw that reminded her of him? Or maybe she’s addicted to criticizing and/or blaming him for her unhappiness?
Well, I’m here to tell you about a wonderful tool that might just put an end to (or at least lessen) the intrusive, harassing communications.
Our Family Wizard is a third-party website for divorced parents in high-conflict situations. It’s a place where all communications can occur. Everything is time-stamped and recorded for use in court should the need arise. As their website states, No more “he said, she said.”
Forty-four states have actually court ordered its use among co-parents as a way to diffuse the aggressive communications between co-parents in hopes of keeping the children out of the middle.
When the other parent sends a new message or does anything else on the site, the other parent gets notified. The parents can choose their method and frequency of notifications, preventing your dinner and other family activities from constantly being interrupted.
There is also a shared calendar, expense reports, private journaling tool and family resource center. Everything that co-parents need is right there in one place.
Of course this may not stop every parent from sending harassing messages – but at least now they’re readily accessible, with a nice little “print” function, to present in court if need be. In fact, the courts can actually log in and see everything for themselves. Very cool.
The website does a much better job than I do at describing in detail all the features it offers. So do your family a favor and check it out!
Note for stepparents: There’s a “third party” feature for stepparents, grandparents, etc… It’s pretty limited as far as the options available, but you can sign in and see the shared calendar and receive messages. Unfortunately, you can’t add events to the calendar. I’ve already contacted OFW about adding that function for stepparents, seeing as (especially stepmoms) we do most of the scheduling. 
© 2012 Jenna Korf All Rights Reserved
What a great idea. I bet it does cut down on some of the negative comments. I’m sure it will increase some also due to one party thinking that the court really cares about the pettiness. But it’s something that’s definately needed and I like the idea that it’s sometimes court-ordered.
We use this tool and it is fantastic. More than worth the $ and I’d recommend it for anybody. They have apps available as well so it really is an efficient way to communicate and you can control when/where you are getting messages (vs random texts and emails that may cause uninvited stress). I’ve heard this being recommended by the courts and think that is great.
I thought this would be an EXCELLENT tool for my husband and his daughters mom to communicate instead of harassing random texts, always asking to deviate from court ordered phone schedule to suit what goes on in her mom, nasty emails, etc. this is the response to this wonderful program we’d like to use:
“No.. I am not interested in this, because I am past the reacting phase of our situation.. I do not feel that it pertains to us, as I have said what I had to say, and am done with it.”
How to deal with someone so unwilling to try a new form of communication that isn’t disruptive…..I’ll never know.
Thank you so much tho.
Hi Denise, often the harassing or difficult party isn’t interested in the this tool because it prevents them from getting whatever need of theirs gets met from the aggressive communication style they’re used to. An option is to collect all the communications, especially the ones that violate the court order, and then file a motion for a judge to order this tool be used as the only communication method – other than in an Emergency. Good luck!
I would just to say this would probably be an awesome idea, as it would benefit in future court proceedings, to show that TD does not take advantage of C/O calls and or video. 95% of interaction between TD and DD3, is initiated by DD3,.TM or SM.. I try to avoid confrontation, but I am a reactor, I admit this openly, it is not a secret, thus my reasoning for getting involved in support groups, and reading guides. We all play our parts. This particular tool at the time, just seemed like another way to get court evidence, that I myself had already submitted, and that is, that we just didn’t get along. At this point, if they still want to pay for it, I am all for it!!