So many of us have been under attack for so long (by an ex-wife, stepchild, boss, co-worker, etc… ) that we forget one very important fact: It’s no one else’s job to take care of us - but ours.
It’s not your husband’s ex-wife’s or the kids’. It’s yours. When you’re wondering how someone could behave the way they do or how they could treat you so poorly, it’s because they’re trying to take care of THEMSELVES the best way they know how – and that is often in conflict with taking care of YOU. It might be an irrational, dysfunctional or unhealthy way – but their end goal is still to make themselves feel better – not make YOU feel better.
When you’re wondering why they haven’t apologized or how they can be so hurtful, remind yourself that it’s not their job to behave in a way that ensures your comfort. It’s not their job to be kind, respectful or healthy. If it was, the world would be a perfect place. Not going to happen.
Soooo…. Stop trying to understand other’s motivations and expecting them to treat you kindly. Instead, remember it’s YOUR job to take care of you. That probably means boundaries to protect yourself. Protect yourself at all costs, because they don’t and won’t have your comfort, security or safety in mind. They have their own.
© 2014 Jenna Korf All Rights Reserved